DressUp
by Lupiesden
Summary: Tony blackmails McGee, teaching him to never again make a deal with Anthony DiNozzo. One-Shot starring the NCIS team.


**Hi peeps. I was writing a chapter of Destination when this idea just popped into my head. I've been watching way too much NCIS, but then again, I can never watch too much NCIS. I love that show, the whole series is amazing. **

**This is slightly from Ziva's POV at first, and I really hope I didn't warp the perfect characters of NCIS too much.**

**Enjoy!**

It was supposed to be a normal day. Go to work, scare Tony, get a case, needle Tony, crack the case, confuse Tony, arrest or kill whoever was responsible, ignore Tony, go home. And yell at Tony somewhere in between. But Gibbs was in a very frustrated mood ever since the last case with McGee and his novels, so she expected a lot less Tony jibes and a lot more working, even if a case didn't pop up. She'd make work then, and she knew that Tony and McGee would avoid attention at any cost.

This sort of thing screamed attention, which surprised her.

It took a lot to surprise her. Of course it did, because she was Ziva David, trained by the Mossad. But this crossed the line.

"McGee. What. Is. THAT?"

The moment she reached her desk she noticed the atrocity he was wearing. McGee, somehow, was dressed in the frilliest, wonkiest, _pinkest_ dress Ziva had ever seen. Her mouth hung open slightly as she tried to fully comprehend what was standing, looking extremely embarrassed, in front of her.

"Ahh, the McGoo is just trying out his undercover suit," Tony said happily, clapping him on the back. McGee made a funny squeaky groaning noise.

"Tony, I think you've had enough," he managed to ground out. Tony pretended to look scandalised.

"What? But Probie, come on," Tony said, laughing, "this is the only time you'll ever get under a dress." McGee tried to say something, but Tony waved him silent, walking around him to adjust his neckline. In Ziva's opinion, it did nothing.

"Besides, this is the hottest I've ever seen you, McGeek," Tony said, "what do you think Ziva? Does McGeek look hot or what?"

She couldn't help it, she laughed. It was too ridiculous, and Tony looked way too pleased with he fact his co-worker looked like a poor cross dresser, with McGee looking as if he wanted to put a trash can on just to hide his face.

"All the guys down at the Internet Cafe are gonna love you! And so is Gibbs!" Tony was smirking evilly, ushering McGee to his desk, or at least trying to.

"No way, Tony, you said just 10 minutes, otherwise you said you'd-" he stopped, looking at Ziva, "otherwise you said you'd show that- that photo we discussed. Remember, you promised not to show it!" Tony gave a mock sigh.

"I lied. Gotta learn Probie! Now is that the elevator I hear?" All the colour drained from McGee's face, not even returning when only Abby and Ducky exited the elevator. They both stopped. There was a silence; Ziva shaking her head, Tony grinning, Abby with a frozen smile, Ducky looking bewildered and finally McGee, still as white as milk.

"Well, Timothy, my boy. Are you well?" Ducky asked, trying his hardest to sound casual, "worried about Gibbs at all, are we?" Abby slowly walked up to McGee, examining his dress. She took his head in her hands, peering into his eyes expertly.

"Are you possessed at all McGee?" When he didn't reply, she pressed on. "Ya know, any weird voices? Thoughts? ...Urges?" He suddenly seemed to snap out of it.

"Uh, uh yeah, just one." He began scrambling for his bag, Tony trying to hold him back. Abby looked pleased.

"See?" she said happily, "he has strange urges!"

"That he does," Ducky said, adding, "you know, this reminds me of a case I once had in London, the poor chap I was working on was dressed very similar to our friend McGee here. But I guess he was luckier."

McGee was attempting to get his shirt away from Tony. Ziva was at a loss on what to do; a first. But Tony moments did that to you.

"Come on, Tony! I need that, quickly!"

"Sorry Probester, just can't help you," Tony laughed. Abby sighed.

"I could really use a Caf-Pow," she lamented, "then everything would be perfect."

"Here you go, Abbs," Gibbs said, handing her a Caf-Pow. Then he caught sight of McGee.

Gibbs said nothing. He simply stared at his mortified Junior Field Agent. He then turned to Tony., whacking him on the back of the head. Ziva took the hint shot into making some work, Abby taking a long draught of her Caf-Pow and heading back to her lab. Gibbs went straight to is desk, while looking to all the world like he didn't even care about the cross-dressing techie, who was now snatching his clothes away from Tony.

"Oh, McGee."

McGee froze.

"Uh, yeah, boss?"

"We've all seen that photo."

**Yeah, yeah, it's pretty sucky. But I've gotta feed my muse, otherwise no other writing gets done. My lame attempt at humour.**

**Well thanks for reading! (presuming you didn't skip to the end.)**

**Lupiesden.**


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